Square
I’m square.
I sit in it
carry it
cumbersome
wear it
a yoke
stare at the
other folk
who seem circular.
You’re square.
You’re square.
How do
you bear it?
Sit in it
and soak
stare at the
other folk
who seem circular.
Wait.
If you sit
roll
a little to the left
I to the right
we might
have an octagon.
Seem circular?
☆
☆
Many thanks to poet friend Carys for making an effective visual piece of this. A co-write indeed.
Categories: Luke Prater, Poetry, Visual/Concrete Poetry Carys, Collaboration, Difference, Free-verse, Geometry, Self-Perception, Square
So glad to see you back here writing…this is so so good Luke.
Cheers Diana, thanks for the visit
Luke,
I liked this poem…I LOVE the visual piece!
Annie
thanks Annie, much appreciate your comments
Definitly luv this one: D<3
Thanks Zandra
Love this Luke…with or without visual….nice “the other folk who seem circular…” fun with the visual shapes too…bkm
Thanks BKM… appreciate your comments. I see you’ve joined our Group on Facebook… I hope you’ll enter our March Creative Challenge? ;-)
Cheers my friend x
Boy, do I feel this way. Enjoyed reading this one because of the flow. I’m new around here, but I’ll be back. :)
Woah. Carys helped bring life to that? Quite a nice visual creation there – adds a whole other layer to the piece. Splendid bit through and through though my friend.
Uber-clever, impressive. Excellent.
nice…i really like the visual version….i think i am more a hexagon…i guess it is all in how we percieve ourselves and those around us…smiles.
I think I’m a triangle. Or perhaps pear shaped. S’all good. Loved the poem and the great visuals. Makes for an entertaining read.
Great illustration as to how the reader is influenced by visual presentation. Liked the first instance very much because it was “outside the box” (incidentally, at first glance I thought it was a pic that hadn’t downloaded yet. lol) However, when the words actually fit the shapes described, it seemed so much more effective and meaningful. Excellent collab.
A co-write! It’s fantastic! Mesmorising, rewarding, conspiratorial I feel recognised…it’s great in two pieces too.
I’m fascinated by them both, the first in particular. This would keep a class of sixth formers busy for a week!
Fantastic.
I dig the final product here…is Ouroboros still with us?
Peace, hp
was great to see this piece develop and i love how julie and you were shaping it – and the visual is excellent – adds so much to the words – one more example how good poets inspire each other
Oh yeah!
I loved this one for the words n presentation both!!!
Octagonal indeed seems circular :)
Lovely Day Dear
xxx
great luke…and carys is clever isnt she…but lets not take way what you have created here either…good poem…pete
I love both incarnations of this brilliant piece! This is one that really makes you stop for a moment and absorb what has been said. Then it is presented visually to make an even deeper impact. Thank you.
Well, actually, I like triangles. :o)
Nice poem.
Super creative, Luke!! And brilliant!
As for the sentiments in the poem, I am with ya, my friend! I am ALL FOR that square-rolled-octagon! :)
I’m beginning to dig shape poetry…
Thanks for your comments, all. Much appreciated.
@Janalyn Voigt Triangles? Of the Pythagorean type, or the complicated love situation-type? :D I hit your blog but couldn’t see anywhere to comment. Smart lookin’ stuff you got going on there
@Kavita yeah, I’m beginning to dig shape/visual/concrete poetry also. I’ve kind of avoided up till now, except in minor ways. Cheers x
Very cool and interesting Luke. I love that you’re always examining new ways of writing and seeing the world. Thanks, Gay
Thanks gay
Playing with the shapes of things makes for a fascinating take on existence. I’m unclear if you were referring to the idea or the essence of shapes but both work well within the poem. My sense of the wider issue is not in the differentiation rather the similarities between the population at large as well as on the individual level. (Shit, it might even be true all the way to Plank-time, but that is a matter for the physicists, not the poets. lol)
Without breaking apart the underlying connectivity that defines human relationships of all kinds, I was entranced by your repeating usage of the term “seemed.” This seems the heart of the analysis in the sense that sometime seeing is not believing. Structure reminded me greatly of Stephen Fry’s “Kinetic Typography” (not sure if you had seen it or not; available at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7E-aoXLZGY )
I’m playing catch-up on comments so apologies for appearing every so often like a damned pinwheel then disappearing repeatedly. Certainly, I do suck at making the appointed rounds to visit. Still, it’s always a pleasure to swing through to read your poetry; such is the signal to noise ratio that the signals are always worth the noise. Hope all is well within your quad-dimensional (time counts as a dimension says Albert Einstein) locale & keep up the great poetry. Until next time,
crb.
Many thanks for another thoughtful and incisive comment, CF. Yes, ‘seemed’ is what it’s all about. Self-perception, perception of others/the Other. If things are bad enough (square), they have a funny way of turning out OK (the octagon-made-of-2-squares-being-almost-circular analogy). This isn’t really about ‘square’ in the usual sense (boring/conformist/straight-laced), though for me personally it has layers of meaning beyond the first that would include that at a certain time in my life.
Dear Luke
Well it was a wonderful and very interesting post and the presentation of your thoughts in such creative way was so exquisite. I liked it so much.. thanks for sharing…
ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com/2011/03/whispers-memories-from-living.html
At Twitter @VerseEveryDay
Thanks Shashi, appreciate your comments
I used to be square. One can round out their corners, especially when no bodies looking.
Yep…. though this isn’t mainly about being ‘square’ in the normal sense (but it can have that layer of meaning too)
Love what you did with this poem — the metaphors, the shaping. It looks like it was a lot of fun. Last year, some students of mine designed their 6-word memoirs into shapes (on their own) and so this brought back some happy memories.
Thanks for stopping by, swetergrl. Are you a poetry/English teacher?
I am actually. Thanks for leaving the comment at my blog. There is a poetry section. My currect fav of my recent offerings is called “Wind Me Up — Run Me Down”. I’d be interested to know what you think.
Ta.
Hi. I just wanted you to know that I have nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award. There’s no pressure to accept, but I think your poetry and blog are pretty special, and thought you deserved an award for all your effort! If you’ve already received this award, then pay no heed to this kudos. ;) Thanks and congratulations!
thanks Dragon, honoured
Like how you suggest the weight of the speaker’s perceptions. Love the visuals, then the words, then the words as visuals..(talented Carys)..what happens when you add your voice? Do you perform your poetry? Visions of you somersaulting round the stage..two voices
Brilliant collaboration..thanks..
And thank you for the visit and comments, Becky, much appreciated
So cool, Luke. I missed this when you posted it before.
I’d love to see the shape of an octagonal poem :)
This made me smile… I’m a square too!
Magnificent and effective, Luke! You and Carys make a great team.
Hi Luke! I kind of like the plain old poem better than the shaped one but I’m a curmudgeon about these thing! (I find them a bit hard to read, and I’m concerned that two squares make a rectangle!)
All that said, I really liked the poem. Square pegs/round holes, difficult to find a place in the world. I love the short crisp lines and directness of it all.
seen this one of yours before and I still think it is cool :)
You and Carys – WOWOW! I like the shaped one best. Square pegs…well you have to remember I’m of the generation when “square” meant straight (that is upright, conventional) and “hip” meant cool (ourside the square which we now call the box) except of course “cool” meant “cool” too..and “cool” still means the same, but has “square” changed or because “straight” certainly has – and for that matter “gay” has too! Gay
Very clever. And yes, very circular. You’re not “square” at all.
Love the multiplicity that is all through this – very clever – very creative – love it
:)
i knew i knew i knew you would post this luke…was my first thought when i saw your link – LOVE this work of you and julie and remember how it developed on the board when you first wrote it…was a joy to see how creativity flows into each other’s ideas…awesome
I’m so glad you shared this. I was hoping that my squared off angles would find a place to fit in and you made it possible. This is fabulous shape poetry with an amazing presentation. The two of you work wonderfully together.
Beth
loved the play on word… and the ingenious conclusiveness
Thanks all. much appreciate you stopping by
I like your bush quantum mechanics approach to philosophy. Wikipedia awaits you:)
@Cressida de Nova Bush Quantum Mechanics? hehe! Thanks Cressida